7/10/2005

Food glorious food


The only action I am posting about lately still seems to have a focus on the kitchen! (Probably it's the only area of my life I have control over at the moment, sick children, and broken sleep because of it and work is up in the air)

If your interested I have posted several new additions to Not Just Desserts - Seafood and pumpkin chowder, roast pork (several days earlier), a few quick canapes and a discussion on menu planning for next week.

Work is actually quite over whelming at the moment I may soon be thrust into the position of the top job with my project team against my better judgment. I really didn't think it was such a concrete possibility I always imagined me supporting a new boss for the next 6 months instead it might be more like me looking for some new support while most of the team is away.

Why didn't I run earlier which is my usual instinct? I guess this time though I thought it was time to stand up and take some responsibility and very soon lots of responsibility for the future direction of my organisation will rest quite heavily on me. So I am preparing to kiss my reasonably balanced family and work life good bye for the next 6 months.

I hope the career woman who is causing this to happen- she is leaving on maternity leave does what she says is going to happen and comes back earlier i.e. 3 months. She has a different perspective to me about her involvement with home life I don't begrudge it all - it's a personal choice.

I have deliberately stayed clear of being suggested for higher jobs, by keeping an extremely low profile. If I can I rarely attend meetings with senior executives so naturally they think "lushlife who?" That is to be no longer shortly, I will only be with my beautiful girl ostensibly 2 days a week and I may have to work on my weekends and long days as well.

I will miss the one day of contact I have with Elliot at school too, I had hoped to attend his next excusion after he implored me one morning on the way to work to come and help with some school things - of course it broke my heart.

I really don't care about the pay-rise it's a means to an ends. I have to just get with the program, it's me or it's me teaching someone else. I am definately having a crisis with my confidence to push the policy agenda of a place I have been with for 1 year in a policy position which ultimately relies on a indepth knowledge of the changes in policy, culture and legislative history for the last decade and a half and it's partnerships in the whole system!

This is definately the cross-roads for my career it is a maker or breaker. I just thought I would be making this decision when Gabriella was older. If I post in six months time I am opening a restaurant - you will know I have failed..........

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